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<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/27954332">The things we leave behind</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/poeticeclipse/pseuds/poeticeclipse'>poeticeclipse</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>The Office (US)</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>Angst, College, College AU, Feels, High School, High School AU, Kid Fic</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>Completed</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2020-12-08</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2020-12-08</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-05-11 00:20:41</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>General Audiences</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>1</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>1,247</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/27954332</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/poeticeclipse/pseuds/poeticeclipse</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>Jim reflects on his childhood friendship with Ryan</p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Relationships:</b></td><td>Jim Halpert/Ryan Howard</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Comments:</b></td><td>6</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>20</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>The things we leave behind</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
      <p>Jim's POV told in flashbacks</p>
    </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>Closing the door of his home office to the shrieks and running feet of his children he sighs and walks over to the lone ragged cardboard box Pam had pulled from storage asking him to go through.</p>
<p>It's all junk from high school, she could have just thrown it out.<br/>He pokes through yearbooks, papers, a couple of random trophies. His breath catches harshly as he shifts the yearbook and a familiar picture falls out fluttering to the floor.<br/>He lifts it carefully with shaking hands and moves to his desk sitting down hard.</p>
<p>He stares at it for a long time, finger tenderly stroking the young face in the picture.</p>
<p>~<br/>Elementary school</p>
<p>They weren't supposed to be on Mr. Mcgruder's land, they knew that, but Ryan had wanted to see the new chicken he boasted to Jim's dad about being able to lay a dozen eggs in one day.</p>
<p>They walk side by side quietly. Earlier they had ran and laughed chasing each other down and giving noogies but as they approach Mcgruder's land a hush falls over them.</p>
<p>leaving the dirt road they make their way up the ditch through the tall grass on the side of the property and shimmy through the narrow space in the sagging fence, cautiously watching the house.<br/>"You sure this is a good idea?" Jim asks.</p>
<p>"I gotta see it, Jim. A chicken that can lay that many eggs is bound to be huge. Like, like this." He gestures with his hands excited.</p>
<p>"No way, he probably just buys them at the store."</p>
<p>"You think?"</p>
<p>Feeling bad at the disappoint on his face Jim says, "Well, I guess it wouldn't hurt to peek. C'mon."</p>
<p>Watching the house they slink quietly across the lawn to the old coop that's really a converted shed.</p>
<p>"Can you see him?" Ryan whispers.</p>
<p>Jim crane's his neck sweating in the hot summer sun. "No. Maybe he's not home."</p>
<p>"His truck is in the drive."</p>
<p>"Just hurry up." He says giving him a boost to peer through the window.</p>
<p>"I cant see."</p>
<p>Jim pants struggling to lift him higher.<br/>He freezes. "Did you hear something?"</p>
<p>"Higher Jim."</p>
<p>"I swear I heard something."</p>
<p>"Just a little more I cant see anything."</p>
<p>He grunts and lifts him as high as he can.</p>
<p>"Hey you kids! Get off my property!"</p>
<p>"Crap!"<br/>Ryan tumbles off Jim's shoulder and they take off running.</p>
<p>"No good kids nosing around my chickens!" He fires his shotgun spraying rock salt in all directions.</p>
<p>Jim grabs Ryan pushing him ahead of him through the fence.</p>
<p>He tumbles down the slope on the other side rolling and landing face first on the rocky ground below.</p>
<p>"Ryan!" Jim runs tripping over his feet. "Are you okay?" He chokes out, turning him over gently brushing the dirt from his scrapes.</p>
<p>Ryan blinks giggling up at him.<br/>"Chicken my butt." He says.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>~<br/>Middle school</p>
<p>They're flying down the sidewalk arms outstretched in the breeze their roller skates clunking in a steady rythm.<br/>Ryan laughs heartily.</p>
<p>"It's not funny, man." Jim whines.</p>
<p>"Yes it is. Jim and Cissy sitting in a tree<br/>k-i-s-s-i-n-g," he sing songs.</p>
<p>"Cut it out. It's not my fault Mrs Harris chose me for Romeo."</p>
<p>"Least you don't have to kiss her lips." Ryan consoles smacking his gum.</p>
<p>That's true and Jim's glad he only has to peck her cheek... but still.</p>
<p>They skid to a stop outside Jim's house falling on the lawn beneath the big oak tree.</p>
<p>"Stop pouting." Ryan nudges.</p>
<p>"Well I never kissed anyone before... 'sides my mom."</p>
<p>Ryan snickers</p>
<p>"What if I slobber on her or something and everyone laughs at me."</p>
<p>Ryan rolls his eyes. "That won't happen. You just need to practice."</p>
<p>Jim looks at him. "Can I practice on you?"</p>
<p>"Gross!" Ryan says jumping up.</p>
<p>"C'mon, man. Please! You're my best friend. I'd help you out." He begs folding his hands and widening his eyes.</p>
<p>"Ugh," Ryan groans. "I hate when you do that."</p>
<p>"Please?"</p>
<p>"A, alright," he agrees hesitantly shifting his feet.</p>
<p>Jim stands suddenly nervous; wiping sweaty palms down his jeans he takes a step forward backing Ryan against the tree and gently clutches his shoulders. "Okay," he breathes leaning in.</p>
<p>Ryan's warm and smells of bubble gum. He presses a little closer letting his lips linger there on his cheek.</p>
<p>"How was that?" He pants stepping back watching Ryan's eyes flutter open.</p>
<p>"Not bad." He gasps. "And only a little wet."</p>
<p>Jim smiles moving his hands to Ryan's hips kissing his chin. "Maybe I need a little more practice," he murmurs coming up to brush a kiss to his nose.</p>
<p>"Maybe." Ryan breathes.</p>
<p>"You know something? You make a pretty good Juliet." He laughs quickly ducking Ryan's swing.</p>
<p>~<br/>High school</p>
<p>Jim slinks into English class all gangly limbs and drops his backpack sliding into a seat beside Ryan.<br/>"What's wrong?" He asks looking over.</p>
<p>"Nothing," he mumbles dipping his chin against his arm, slouched in his seat.</p>
<p>He gets like this everytime his dad visits.<br/>"Want to come to my house after school? We can play video games."</p>
<p>"Sure," he mumbles and makes an effort to lift his head and flash a strained and tired smile.</p>
<p>"No no no!" Jim hollers as he once again loses by a hair.</p>
<p>"Wow, you suck," Ryan laughs.</p>
<p>Jim looks at him grinning mischievously and tosses his controller down. "Yeah?" He asks tackling him. They wrestle for a minute before Ryan starts to complain.</p>
<p>"Get off."</p>
<p>"Never!" Jim laughs flipping him over. His hands still when Ryan's breath comes out in a rush and his whole body tenses.</p>
<p>"What?"</p>
<p>"Nothing," he winces.</p>
<p>Jim looks at him strangely slowly sliding his shirt up.</p>
<p>He stares in horror at the belt shaped bruises lining his back.</p>
<p>"Ry?"</p>
<p>"Please, Jim." he breathes out slowly gripping the carpet.</p>
<p>Jim continues to stare at the angry marks. Dipping his head he presses tender kisses to each one as Ryan shakes beneath him.</p>
<p>When he's done he lays beside him on the living room floor sliding a hand through his hair.</p>
<p>"Stay the night?" He asks. "My mom won't mind."</p>
<p>He nods, finally daring to make eye contact. "Thanks, Jim." He whispers.</p>
<p>Jim reaches over gently thumbing a tear away. "Anything." He promises.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>~<br/>College</p>
<p>"Jim!" Ryan shouts bouncing on the bed.</p>
<p>"What?" He groans into his text book.</p>
<p>Ryan sprawls next to him. "Cameron's throwing a party tonight. You in?"</p>
<p>"I have to study, man."</p>
<p>"You're always studying."</p>
<p>Jim rolls over looking at him through scraggly bangs. "Why don't you hang out here?"</p>
<p>"And miss a party?"</p>
<p>"Ry, c'mon," he says softly. "You need to slow down."</p>
<p>His face hardens. "I don't need a lecture, Jim."</p>
<p>"You have such a brilliant mind," he says brushing his mop of curls back. "Don't throw it away." He slides his hand along his ribs. "I I miss you, man. I miss seeing those eyes when they're not bloodshot or glassy."</p>
<p>Ryan's eyes flit down in shame.</p>
<p>"Stay with me tonight? We can order pizza. Watch whatever terrible movie you pick." His hand slips beneath the hem of his t-shirt stroking against his stomach.</p>
<p>"Alright," he mumbles dropping his head to Jim's shoulder. "But you're buying."</p>
<p> </p>
<p>~<br/>Present day</p>
<p>He sits back in his chair pinching the bridge of his nose, shoulders shaking, and wonders not for the first time, what his life would be like if that drunk driver hadn't stolen his little cherub faced boy from him.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>.</p>
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